62 Penguin Jokes You’ll Think Are the Coolest


In the whimsical world of humor, these cheesy (but cool!) penguin jokes offer a flurry of laughs and icy punchlines. We hope this list of delightful jests featuring our tuxedoed friends will bring a smile to your face and warm your heart with their frosty wit.

Penguin Jokes You’ll Think Are the Coolest

What do you call a penguin in the desert?

What do you call a penguin in the desert?

Lost.

Lost.

Why don’t you ever see penguins in the United Kingdom?

Why don't you ever see penguins in the United Kingdom?

Because they're afraid of Wales.

Because they’re afraid of Wales.

How do penguins drink their coffee?

How do penguins drink their coffee?

With ice and a

With ice and a “waddle” of cream.

What’s a penguin’s favorite relative?

What's a penguin's favorite relative?

Aunt Arctica.

Aunt Arctica.

What did one penguin say to the other penguin who was sitting alone at a party?

What did one penguin say to the other penguin who was sitting alone at a party?

“You look ice-solated!”

What kind of fish do penguins catch at night?

What kind of fish do penguins catch at night?

Starfish.

Starfish.

What’s a penguin’s favorite movie?

What's a penguin's favorite movie?

Happy Feet.

Happy Feet.

How do penguins celebrate their birthdays?

How do penguins celebrate their birthdays?

They have fish cakes.

They have fish cakes.

How does a penguin build its house?

How does a penguin build its house?

Igloos it together.

Igloos it together.

Why do penguins make terrible poker players?

Why do penguins make terrible poker players?

Because they're afraid of the ice-cold hands.

Because they’re afraid of the ice-cold hands.

What do you call a group of trumpeter penguins?

What do you call a group of trumpeter penguins?

A brrrass band.

A brrrass band.

How do get a penguin’s attention?

How do get a penguin's attention?

You "break the ice."

You “break the ice.”

How do penguins keep their money safe?

How do penguins keep their money safe?

They keep it in a snowbank.

They keep it in a snowbank.

What do you get when you cross a penguin and a snowman?

What do you get when you cross a penguin and a snowman? Frostbite.- penguin jokes

Frostbite.

How do penguins make decisions?

How do penguins make decisions?

Flipper coins.

Flipper coins.

What’s a penguin’s favorite type of music?

What's a penguin's favorite type of music?

Anything with a cool beat.

Anything with a cool beat.

Why don’t penguins like talking to strangers at parties?

Why don't penguins like talking to strangers at parties?

They find it hard to break the ice.

They find it hard to break the ice.

How do penguins communicate with each other?

How do penguins communicate with each other?

They send each other ice-o-grams.

They send each other ice-o-grams.

How do penguins drink their cola?

How do penguins drink their cola?

On the rocks.

On the rocks.

How do penguins know when something’s wrong?

How do penguins know when something's wrong?

It smells fishy.

It smells fishy.

What did the penguin order at the fast-food restaurant?

What did the penguin order at the fast-food restaurant?

Ice-burgers and frosty fries.

Ice-burgers and frosty fries.

What do penguins like to wear on the beach?

What do penguins like to wear on the beach?

A beak-ini.

A beak-ini.

How do you get in touch with a penguin?

How do you get in touch with a penguin? Give him a wing.- penguin jokes

Give him a wing.

Why did the penguin cross the road?

Why did the penguin cross the road?

To go with the floe.

To go with the floe.

Why don’t penguins like rock music?

Why don’t penguins like rock music?

They only like sole.

They only like sole.

What do you call a happy penguin?

What do you call a happy penguin?

A pen-grin!

A pen-grin!

What do you call a cold penguin?

What do you call a cold penguin?

A brrr-d.

A brrr-d.

What do you give to a penguin that’s ill?

What do you give to a penguin that’s ill?

Some medical tweetment.

Some medical tweetment.

What does a penguin do if it loses its tail?

What does a penguin do if it loses its tail? It goes to a re-tail store.- penguin jokes

It goes to a re-tail store.

Where do penguins go to watch movies?

Where do penguins go to watch movies?

The dive-in.

The dive-in.

Where do penguins go dancing?

Where do penguins go dancing?

The Snow Ball.

The Snow Ball.

Who is the head of the Penguin Navy?

Who is the head of the Penguin Navy? Admiral Byrd.- penguin jokes

Admiral Byrd.

Why are penguins good race car drivers?

Why are penguins good race car drivers?

They are always in pole position.

They are always in pole position.

How does a penguin build a LEGO house?

How does a penguin build a LEGO house?

Igloos it together!

Igloos it together!

Why would a penguin cross the road twice?

Why would a penguin cross the road twice? To prove he isn’t a chicken.- penguin jokes

To prove he isn’t a chicken.

What’s black and white and goes round and round?

What’s black and white and goes round and round?

A penguin in a revolving door.

A penguin in a revolving door.

Why are penguins so difficult to get along with?

Why are penguins so difficult to get along with?

Because they’re always fishing for compliments.

Because they’re always fishing for compliments.

What is a penguin’s favorite Mexican food?

What is a penguin’s favorite Mexican food? Brrrrrr-itos.- penguin jokes

Brrrrrr-itos.

Why do two penguins in a nest always agree?

Why do two penguins in a nest always agree?

Because they don’t want to fall out.

Because they don’t want to fall out.

What’s black, white, black, white, black, white, black, white …?

What’s black, white, black, white, black, white, black, white ...?

A penguin rolling down a hill.

A penguin rolling down a hill.

What do penguins wear on their head?

What do penguins wear on their head?

Ice caps.

Ice caps.

Who is a penguin’s favorite pop star?

Who is a penguin’s favorite pop star? Seal.- penguin jokes

Seal.

What do penguins sing on birthdays?

What do penguins sing on birthdays?

“Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.”

“Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.”

When I meet new people, I always talk about my giant pet penguin …

When I meet new people, I always talk about my giant pet penguin ...

It’s a good icebreaker.

It’s a good icebreaker.

Why shouldn’t you write a book on penguins?

Why shouldn’t you write a book on penguins?

Because writing a book on paper is much easier!

Because writing a book on paper is much easier!

Why didn’t the penguin jump off the iceberg?

Why didn’t the penguin jump off the iceberg? He got cold feet.- penguin jokes

He got cold feet.

Why do polar bears and penguins not get along?

Why do polar bears and penguins not get along?

Because they are polar opposites.

Because they are polar opposites.

Why do penguins wear glasses?

Why do penguins wear glasses?

To help their ice-sight.

To help their ice-sight.

Why don’t penguins fly?

Why don’t penguins fly?

Because they’re not tall enough to be pilots.

Because they’re not tall enough to be pilots.

What do penguins drink in the summer?

What do penguins drink in the summer? Iced tea.- penguin jokes

Iced tea.

What shoes do penguins wear in the summer?

What shoes do penguins wear in the summer?

Flipper flops.

Flipper flops.

What do penguins wear on their feet at night?

What do penguins wear on their feet at night?

Slippers.

Slippers.

How do penguins pass their driving tests?

How do penguins pass their driving tests? They wing it.- penguin jokes

They wing it.

How does a penguin cook burgers?

How does a penguin cook burgers?

With its flippers.

With its flippers.

What do penguin waiters say to their customers?

What do penguin waiters say to their customers?

“Waddle it be?”

Why do penguins always carry fish in their beaks?

Why do penguins always carry fish in their beaks?

They don’t have any pockets.

They don’t have any pockets.

What’s a penguin’s favorite place to swim?

What’s a penguin’s favorite place to swim? The South Pool.- penguin jokes

The South Pool.

What is black and white and red all over?

What is black and white and red all over?

A sunburned penguin.

A sunburned penguin.

How do penguins finish a race?

How do penguins finish a race?

They pengwin.

They pengwin.

What’s a penguin’s favorite pasta?

What’s a penguin’s favorite pasta? Penguini.- penguin jokes

Penguini.

Can a penguin fly?

Can a penguin fly?

No, but a toucan.

No, but a toucan.

What are the oldest animals?

What are the oldest animals?

Zebras and penguins because they’re in black and white.

Zebras and penguins because they’re in black and white.

Which are your favorite penguin jokes? Come share in our We Are Teachers HELPLINE group on Facebook!

Plus, if you liked these penguin jokes, check out these Cheesy Teacher Jokes That Make Us Laugh Out Loud.



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