In the whimsical world of humor, these cheesy (but cool!) penguin jokes offer a flurry of laughs and icy punchlines. We hope this list of delightful jests featuring our tuxedoed friends will bring a smile to your face and warm your heart with their frosty wit.
Penguin Jokes You’ll Think Are the Coolest
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Why don’t you ever see penguins in the United Kingdom?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
How do penguins drink their coffee?
With ice and a “waddle” of cream.
What’s a penguin’s favorite relative?
What did one penguin say to the other penguin who was sitting alone at a party?
“You look ice-solated!”
What kind of fish do penguins catch at night?
What’s a penguin’s favorite movie?
How do penguins celebrate their birthdays?
They have fish cakes.
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together.
Why do penguins make terrible poker players?
Because they’re afraid of the ice-cold hands.
What do you call a group of trumpeter penguins?
A brrrass band.
How do get a penguin’s attention?
You “break the ice.”
How do penguins keep their money safe?
They keep it in a snowbank.
What do you get when you cross a penguin and a snowman?
How do penguins make decisions?
What’s a penguin’s favorite type of music?
Anything with a cool beat.
Why don’t penguins like talking to strangers at parties?
They find it hard to break the ice.
How do penguins communicate with each other?
They send each other ice-o-grams.
How do penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
How do penguins know when something’s wrong?
It smells fishy.
What did the penguin order at the fast-food restaurant?
Ice-burgers and frosty fries.
What do penguins like to wear on the beach?
How do you get in touch with a penguin?
Give him a wing.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe.
Why don’t penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
What do you call a happy penguin?
What do you call a cold penguin?
What do you give to a penguin that’s ill?
Some medical tweetment.
What does a penguin do if it loses its tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
Where do penguins go to watch movies?
Where do penguins go dancing?
The Snow Ball.
Who is the head of the Penguin Navy?
Why are penguins good race car drivers?
They are always in pole position.
How does a penguin build a LEGO house?
Igloos it together!
Why would a penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he isn’t a chicken.
What’s black and white and goes round and round?
A penguin in a revolving door.
Why are penguins so difficult to get along with?
Because they’re always fishing for compliments.
What is a penguin’s favorite Mexican food?
Why do two penguins in a nest always agree?
Because they don’t want to fall out.
What’s black, white, black, white, black, white, black, white …?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
What do penguins wear on their head?
Who is a penguin’s favorite pop star?
What do penguins sing on birthdays?
“Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.”
When I meet new people, I always talk about my giant pet penguin …
It’s a good icebreaker.
Why shouldn’t you write a book on penguins?
Because writing a book on paper is much easier!
Why didn’t the penguin jump off the iceberg?
He got cold feet.
Why do polar bears and penguins not get along?
Because they are polar opposites.
Why do penguins wear glasses?
To help their ice-sight.
Why don’t penguins fly?
Because they’re not tall enough to be pilots.
What do penguins drink in the summer?
What shoes do penguins wear in the summer?
What do penguins wear on their feet at night?
How do penguins pass their driving tests?
They wing it.
How does a penguin cook burgers?
With its flippers.
What do penguin waiters say to their customers?
“Waddle it be?”
Why do penguins always carry fish in their beaks?
They don’t have any pockets.
What’s a penguin’s favorite place to swim?
The South Pool.
What is black and white and red all over?
A sunburned penguin.
How do penguins finish a race?
What’s a penguin’s favorite pasta?
Can a penguin fly?
No, but a toucan.
What are the oldest animals?
Zebras and penguins because they’re in black and white.